Really, Monster?


Because I’m still working a contract job, I’m looking for more steady work. I have signed up for job alerts on several job sites, including Indeed, LinkedIn, Glassdoor and Monster.

Some of these are better than others.

Most of my e-mail alerts are set for writer jobs making at least $40k a year (I deserve more, but the Louisville market is ridiculously low-paying). Some are set for proofreading, copy editing, etc. I get many daily e-mails.

Some of the alerts are a little … off.

For example, LinkedIn sends me jobs like dermatologist (wha?), internships and volunteer jobs. To be fair, I don’t think I ever officially signed up for job alerts from LinkedIn. And they don’t send emails every day, so I just chuckle and delete. My recent fave is “Volunteer Virtual Classroom Speaker (Do you want to share your METEOROLOGY expertise with students?)”

Of course I do! “Hey, students. Look out the window. Is it raining?” That’s pretty much my meteorology expertise. I’m the Brick Tamland of meteorology.


Monster sends me the most ridiculous job alerts so far.


  1. Staff auditor
  2. LPN Clinical Coordinator
  3. Licensed Practical Vocational Nurse
  4. Design Engineer – HVAC
  5. Service Desk Analyst
  6. Java Programmer
  7. Audit Senior – Work Life Balance + Large Regional Firm
  8. Office Services Associate
  9. Window & Door Sales Specialist
  10. Senior Auditor

You may notice that the word “writer” is not in ANY of those jobs. For most of those positions, you do need to be able to write things on paper or into a computer, but that’s not being a writer. That’s being a write-downer. Or noter, if you will.

I guess I could be an auditor, depending on what I’m auditing. If it’s numbers … no. I do know a lot about work-life balance because I have very little. But I suspect that’s not what they’re auditing.

One proofreading job was for a Braille proofreader. Don’t you think a Braille proofreader who is looking for a job would put “Braille” in his or her job search? I don’t think that is something I can learn on the job.

And don’t get me started on this nonsense …


Happy job hunting!

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